If I actually spoke my mind I wouldn’t have any friends left.
Facebook Status Ideas
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- The new iPad should be called the new iFad.
- A balanced diet is a chocolate bar in each hand…or a coffee in each hand.
- If midnight snacks weren’t meant to be eaten why is there a light in the fridge?
- Fun new trend at the office. People are putting names on food in the company fridge. Today, I had a tuna sandwich named Bob.
- I don’t know what I’d do without Facebook, but I bet it would be something productive.
- I bet that if you understood Morse Code, tap dancers would drive you crazy.
- Life is all about perspective. The sinking of the Titanic was a miracle to the lobsters in the ship’s kitchen.
- I always lock the front door when I take a shower, because if a murderer broke in and heard me singing I’d be so embarassed.
- Don’t be ridiculous, that’s my job.
- I know the voices in my head aren’t real, but they have some great ideas.
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